Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Praying for our Babies :)

The Day we got Implanted with the Twins

We are still trying to cope with the news we got on Sunday about our remaining babies... It's not an easy thing to be going through for either of us...
One thing we have been doing is talking to the two in my belly and telling them to hang on and that we love them and can't wait to meet them and hold them in our arms in 9 months. We also pray over them and read the bible to them.
I take my test next Wednesday morning to find out how they are doing and if they have implanted. As of now... I am a mom and Justin is a dad and we are pregnant. I have been having mild cramping, and avoiding foods I would normally eat because I am getting queazy... Hopefully all really good signs of pregnancy. But I am taking it easy and getting my rest because well... I am so sleepy all the time and the rainy weather is not helping, LOL! Please keep praying for our two precious babies in my tummy. Pray they hold on and get all burrowed in :)

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Dealing With a Loss...

(This is how Big the twins are)

We got the dreaded phone call on Sunday morning about the remaining three embryos... They don't look good at all, but we told them to go ahead and freeze them anyways and we will put them in next time. The chances are really low for their survival... They are just not growing (not enough cells)... Then we had to give the go ahead for them to put aside the other 3 that stopped growing on day three. They told us that they have passed away... So really the only stable ones are the two in me... Quite a blow to both of us... We cried over their little lives and not ever being able to meet them or hold them... We have loved and prayed for each and every one of them from the moment the Lord gave them life. We are praying that one day we will see them in heaven. I am trying to keep it together and to think positively about the two inside me. My tummy is HUGE right now and I pray it keeps growing for the two inside of me. I have been cramping for the past couple days; so hopefully that means the babies are moving in and getting comfy. Please pray they are doing well and thriving inside of me. Pray also for the Lord to give us peace during this time.
Christ's Love, Justin and Laura

Saturday, September 25, 2010

The BIG Day!

Okay so we went in today to do the transfer this morning. We received sad news that three of our embryos have stopped growing but they are going to leave them alone just to make sure they have passed away... Then they told us that 5 of them look good and should be fully developed blastocyst's by tonight. They said we had 30% chance of pregnancy if we do (1) but 40% if we do (2).
After the Dr. walked out, it gave us time to make a decision. I sat there and sobbed in Justin's arms over those three little lives. It broke our hearts... It hits you like a brick wall... After 5 minuets, the Dr's came back in after I got on the table. I laid there shaking with the emotions of fear, sadness and anxiety. But the Lord gave us peace and reassurance when we told the Doctor to put (2) back inside me. We did not go in there thinking we would do that, but we did. We know this is all in the Lords hands and He has opened so many doors for us. We feel so blessed to have 5 very healthy embryos. When they prepped me for transfer I was in so much pain. I have a lot going on inside me, plus a full bladder (better to have one with the transfer) did not help with the discomfort. The pressure of the speculum hurt so much but the transfer itself was not painful. I got to see it on the monitor next to my bed. I wanted to cry, but I knew that if I started I wouldn't be able to stop myself from sobbing. Just the thought of these (2) tiny little souls inside of me was so overwhelming and seeing it was just amazing. We walked in as 2 but left as 4.
Please pray this pregnancy takes and that Lord puts His hands of protection over all of us.
We feel very confident about our decision. They are going to freeze the rest tomorrow and call us Sunday early morning to let us know if there is any changes in the remaining embryos. This was our last step in this very BIG process. The Lord has been so faithful and loving during this time and so has our friends and family. Thank you all for your loving support during this very difficult time. My hormones are so high right now. I have 800mg of progesterone pumping through my veins a day. So I am feeling very anxious, sleepy, and emotional/ sensitive. Please pray the Lord gives us peace through the next two weeks.
Love, Justin and Laura

Thursday, September 23, 2010

Beautiful Flowers This Week!!

Yesterday Justin brought home lilies to let me know he loves me :) Then today he brought home eight roses. One for each baby that the Lord created this week. It was so sweet of him to do for me and the babies. I hope they know how much there mommy and Daddy already love them :)
Thank you Justin for taking good care of me during your exams this week. I know it has not been easy on either of us. Thank you for loving me...
Our friend Cath from church came over and brought me flowers. They are so beautiful! Thank you Cath :)

Day of Egg Retrieval. Monday-September-20th-2010

Before the Egg retrieval.... Little nervous..

Post-Operation... feeling a bit groggy.

Happy about our 15 eggs!!

My hand is killing... they bruised a tendon.


Drinking my tea and eating my biscuits...

Saturday Transfer @ 10:00am

Okay... I had a good cry this morning when I got the call about our 3 day old embryos. 5 out of 8 of them are A/B quality= GREAT! But the remaining 3 out of the 8 are growing very slow... I know they are still so small but they are our babies and we want them all to survive. We are doing a Saturday transfer with one of the 5 A/ B quality babies. Saturday it reaches blastocyst stage (the stage it reaches right before it hatches and attaches to the uterus). I am happy we are waiting till then. It will give my body some time to calm down and a better chance for attachment.
As for the 3 that are not growing very fast, they are going to let them keep growing up to 7 days so they can catch up and freeze the ones that don't pass away... That is going to be a hard day for us if we get that news... We want them all to be heathy and survive. So please pray for our tiny babies, Justin and me. We know it is all in God's hands so we are trusting in Him and finding comfort that this is all going to work out for His glory...

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Family and Friends are a blessing...

My bloating has doubled in size and my pain has gotten worse. I asked the embryologist if that is normal and she said yes and to just keep drinking water and stand up every once in a while. I said well I have no choice but to stand every 20-30min when my bladder feels like it is going to burst! She also told me that if the embryos look good on Thursday we are going to do a Saturday transfer. If not and they are not looking very good they are going to put one in on Thursday at 3:00 and let the rest keep maturing then freeze them till next time.

Justin and I have so much on our plate right now and it is an emotional roller-coaster... With Visa stuff, his exams this week and all the IVF procedures and pain, we are spent emotionally. But having friends and family in our lives, praying, helping, and encouraging us, means a lot. we love sharing this with those we love and care about.
My mom got so excited to hear that we have 8 embryos. It was good to see her smile and get excited over this. It is nice to share this exciting news with you mom and thank you for the prayers. I know it is hard for you not being here for me, but you are here in my heart and it is all in the Lords hands. He is taking very good care of me :)
Thank you Liz and Leslie for calling me yesterday to see how I was and getting excited with Justin and me. It means a lot to us that you both are there for us. We loved sharing this happy news with both of you.
Thank you Manny, Kim and Kalie for all the prayers and encouragement, we love you all so very much and are so blessed to have you all in our life and sharing this with you :)
We want our families to know that it helps to ease our anxiety when they show interest and excitement with us. So please keep up the encouraging words and joy for the life the Lord has created this week. Eight tiny lives that now belong to this loving family...
The Lord has blessed us with such sweet friends that call, come over, makes us dinner while I am on bed rest, or driving us to our appointment on Monday, it was such a blessing. You find out a lot about who is really there for you in a crunch. I hope I can be as good as a friend to them as they have been to me. Thank you Oxford friends...It means a lot to us. You are our family and we are so blessed to have you in our life. And for the offers of making meals for us from Kelli's friend to whom I have not even met was so sweet... Thank you :) Oh and Kelli, thank you for the BEST chicken pot pie I have ever had!! That is all I have eaten for the past two days, LOL!
Please keep praying for us and for the Lord to allow this door to be opened...
We really want to hold our baby and love it with all that we have. It would bring so much joy into our home...

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

8 babies!!

I Just got the call from the embryologist and she informed me that we have 8 embryos. They are going to leave them alone for 48 hours and look at them again early Thursday morning and call us at 8:00-9:00am to let us know which ones are still growing and doing well. We are scheduled to do implanting at 3:00pm Thursday afternoon if the embryos are not multiplying quite as fast. But if they are they are going to do it on Saturday. I am so excited and had a good cry this morning over it. This whole process is so emotional and is so real... We have 8 babies right now and we praise God for them. I will probably be shocked for the next couple of days as well as weeping and praying for our babies non-stop. Please pray they do well and that they keep maturing and growing strong as well as my uterus. Please pray for protection over my uterus and for the Lord to make it nice and cozy for the little embryo that is going to put inside of me.
Thank you Lord Jesus for making this possible!!! We are so blessed...

Monday, September 20, 2010

15 eggs!!

15 eggs!! I am doing well, but I am hyper stimulated..
So I need lots of water and rest. I'm a bit woozy, nauseous and in pain. I also woke up during the procedure and talked to the Dr's, LOL! I don't remember what I said, but they dosed me back up to shut me up. Oh and yes I could feel the pain of them shoving the needle through my uterus and into my ovary when I was awake. I started screaming.
Pray for the embryos to do well tonight.
We will know how many we will have tomorrow.
Love you all, Laura

Sunday, September 19, 2010

BIG Day Tomorrow!

I can't believe it is already here! No more drugs.. Well that is not entirely true.. I have that wonderful little suppository tomorrow morning... Can we just say yuck and get it out of the way? But the up side of it all (No pun intended) is that it is going to make me feel like I am on cloud nine! On top of that I will have a nice little needle going in on top of my hand pumping me with the good juice of Oh-YEAH! I won't feel a thing until tomorrow night and by then I will be fast asleep hopefully...
Then we just wait till we get that all important phone call to let us know how many babies we will have on Tuesday!! Yippee!! Please pray that the Lord will keep his hand of protection on them and that they progress nicely for transfer on Friday.
Love you friends and family

Friday, September 17, 2010

So I was told today that a mature follicle is the size of a grape! So that means my right ovary has 14 grapes in it right now! That is a lot of Grapes! No wonder I look like I am 3 months pregnant and in so much pain! Oh well it is all worth it :) I would do it all over again...

We are good to go!!!

Egg collection is Monday Morning at 8:00am!!

This is my schedule till then:

follicle stimulation shot (Last one) 9:00pm
Sniff at 10:00pm

Sniff morning and night
HCG hormone injection 9:00pm

Drug free!!

No food only water till 6:00am
Be there at 7:30 am
Egg Collection 8:00am (last for 30~min)
Recovery for 2 hours

Monday - Egg retrieval

The fluid within each follicle is gently sucked out and given to the embryologists who search for the egg using a microscope. This procedure takes about 20 minutes and almost all women are fully recovered and able to go home after a couple of hours.

Monday - Insemination

Sperm and eggs are incubated overnight in a special fluid that provides them with all the right nutrients to allow fertilisation to occur. The next morning, the eggs are checked for signs of fertilisation.

Thursday- Embryo transfer

Embryos are placed gently inside the womb on the second, third or fifth day after egg retrieval. Embryo transfer is an outpatient procedure which takes only a few minutes to perform.


Okay!! The results are in.....

After I had a nurse use a very painful internal ultrasound on me while I winced on the table and squeezing my poor husbands had half to death. She told me that I have tons of follicles!! The nurse said it is no wonder I am in so much pain because my ovaries are HUGE!! She told me that I am ready to have them taken out today but we of course need to wait and see what the Dr. says today at 2:30. I think we are looking at a egg retrieval on Monday morning. I have 14 fully developed follicle in my right and I think around 10-12 in my Left ovary. We are not sure that all of them have eggs but as it stands it looks like a ton!! My tummy is SO bloated and it hurts for me to just sit, I have to lay down because of the pressure. Pray these last couple of days go smooth and fast. I have to take the last shot 35 hours before egg retrieval. So I believe I will be doing the shot on Saturday. Not sure what time? Please keep praying for this to work and for Justin to do well on his exams Monday-Thursday.
We love you all, Laura :)

Thursday, September 16, 2010

Last Shot!!

I just did the last shot of the follicle stimulation drug. Tomorrow is our Doctors appointment. We should see how many eggs we have. Pray, Pray, Pray we have perfect little eggs just itching to be inseminated!! I am so unbelievably bloated right now. Plus the appointment is super early @ 8:30am tomorrow morning... Pray we can get up on time and get a good nights sleep.
I will write tomorrow and give you heads up on what's going on.
Peace out~ Laura

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

The Lady Bug that made me smile...

I took this photo the other day and it made me smile. I was looking at something else to photograph and there she was... Just sitting there on a blade of grass. I thought about how I feel like I am balancing and trying not to fall apart. This has been such a stressful time for us... But the Lord helps me smile through it because I know that the He is there with me holding my hand... I thank you Lord for the small things in life that make me smile. Those are the things that help me get through the tough times. The Lord shows me things He knows will put a smile on my face :) I am so blessed that He has opened my eyes to his beautiful creation all around us... It is such a blessing.

My ovaries feel HUGE!!

This photo shows how they get the eggs out. By going through the uterus and ovaries.

Today has gotten worse... I can hardly sit with out feeling pressure on my ovaries. More so my right one that already had 11 follicles to begin with. I am having sharp pain in both of them, kind of like little needles stabbing me. I am sure my Endometriosis is not helping out in the pain department. Right now they are stretching and doubling in size. No fun... With every step I take, it has to be a gentle one. Now I know why they say no exercising. Not like you could on this stuff anyways unless your a glutton for punishment. Two more shots then we go in at 8:30am Friday morning for an ultrasound and blood work. No telling how many eggs I have going on down there, but we are hoping for them to be mature and ready to rock and roll! They feel like they want to burst out of me. Still having hot flashes, dizzy, sleepy, back pain and headaches.
I will let you know what happens on Friday.
Pray all is well and that my ovaries don't hyper stimulate, because that can be very dangerous.

Monday, September 13, 2010

One week till egg retrieval.

SO... I am getting a bit on edge about the whole egg retrieval process. I am praying my body is doing okay and will produce lots of mature eggs. And hopefully my body will except our baby and keep it warm, cozy and safe. I am feeling the weight of the world on my shoulders right now and I know the hormones are not helping. I am having HOT flashes when it is 58 degrees out. Although today we finally caved and turned the heat on, because our home was freezing in here! It is hard for others to know what we are going through unless you go through it yourself... But our friends here have been so wonderful and supportive to us during this time. We think of them as our family and are so blessed the Lord has put them in our lives. thank you all for the loving phone calls, flowers and visits. You really don't know how much it means to us to have support and love here... I hope to make you all aunties and uncles very soon!!

Thursday, September 9, 2010

I did it!!!

Okay, maybe I am not Wonder Woman when it comes to needles... I freaked.. A LOT! But after I got over my freaking out I realized that the needle is so small you can't even feel it go in! I am so relived to know that for the next 8 days I won't feel a thing and I am sure my husband is as well. Not to say I won't freak out a little every time I see the needle (phobia) but I can now reassure him, it is not him or the needle hurting me it is just me being a wimp!

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Injections here we come!

We have jumped another hurtle with my blood work. It came back and I am ready for injections tomorrow. We are very excited about this and are so blessed that my body is reacting perfectly to the drugs. I must admit, I am a bit nervous over the whole needle thing. I have always had a great fear over them. Please just pray for me not to hyperventilate and not make my husband nervous while he injects me. Pray he can inject me pain free and nerves free.

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Practice Time!!

Today Justin and I went to the clinic to do blood work. The nurse was great and found my vein the first time. She helped us practice doing injections into a fake tummy and we actually injected the meds into it. It was kind of cool. I was watching Justin and he did a great job. Then I had a go at it and I freaked a bit looking at the needle but it went in smooth as hot butter. Not sure yet if I am going to do it myself or Justin... But either way we start injecting at 9:00pm Thursday night. She told me it is going to make me sleepy, which is great because my other meds I am taking makes me wired!! She said my ovaries will be getting quite big and sensitive, so I need to take it easy and not do any exercising. It's not like I have been doing any the past couple weeks on this stuff anyways. Oh and she said I am going to get really bloated, LOL! I said I already am, can't wait to see how huge I get now!
We go back in on Sep-17th at 8:30am to check on my ovaries/ follicle and egg growth. Then we should be doing the egg retrieval around Monday Sep-20th then the implant around Friday Sep-24th.

We are calling tomorrow at 2:30 to see how my hormones are and if we get the go ahead for injections.
Thank you for the prayers and for the friends that have been here for us by visiting, bringing me flowers or even a small pumpkin for the Fall!! You all have been so wonderful and supportive during this stressful time...
We Love you all so very much and will keep you up-dated along the way.
Justin and Laura

Saturday, September 4, 2010

Fall is HERE!!

I just made some Peanut-Butter, Ghirardelli Chocolate Chip, Rice Krispies treats to kick this Fall Season off! I am loving this weather and getting really excited that in 2 1/2 weeks I will be pregnant!! I have my blood test on Tuesday, then start my follicle growing shots on Thursday. Can't wait!! So for now I am going to enjoy my treats, my husband and God's grace on opening this door for us :)

Thursday, September 2, 2010

Apple Puff Pie Makes Everything Better!!

I got up this morning and was determined to accomplish something before I got sick again. I am glad I did because now I just want to get back into bed... Here is my apple puff pastry pie I made this morning for my sweet husband :)The apples are tart so I added brown sugar and cinnamon. It was still a little tart but just right with whip cream on top :)
My bleeding has almost come to a halt. So all I am dealing with now is feeling sleepy, dizzy (Room Spinning all the time), with a side of migraines...
I will take those any day over the pain I had a couple days ago...